Closure or Why I still haven't forgiven HIMYM

For the last seven years How I Met Your Mother was one of the few TV shows in my life that was appointment viewing. Every Monday from the first night I discovered the show I tuned in. For five seasons I was blissfully on board with every Barney catchphrase, every Mosby dumb romantic gesture, and every other shenanigan that made the show so unique.

Then season six hit the airwaves, and slowly but surely all my blind enjoyment eroded until the cataclysmic ending. Over the last four seasons HIMYM doubled down on the failings of the final seasons of friends. The show's writers embraced the worst parts its characters idiosyncrasies: Ted was a whiny, often moronic sap, Marshall was an over-the-top loveable dope, Lily was a sweet but vindictive menace, and Robin was a straight up mess with too many faults to recount. Thankfully Barney remained his madman self and was actually redeemed in a believable and slow manner.

Before I get to the broadcast ending/alternate ending that inspired this post, let me recount the lowest, darkest point in HIMYM that nearly forced me to turn off the television and give up on eight seasons of loyal viewing. Season eight, episode five the gang is all tail spinning in one way or another, but the most deplorable, sloppy writing/acting in the entire run of the show comes in the form of Marshall transforming into a "slightly more feminine" Lily, who is purposefully trying to become a sassy advice giver worthy of someone saying "testify." Horse apples. On to the finale!

***SPOILERS AHEAD***

As far as the end of the show, nearly everything was great. The final season really made up for some drastically wrong turns in the preceding seasons. It wasn't close to the seasons 2-4 in terms of cleverness and enjoyment, but it was reasonably close. Then the finale aired... which was so horrendous... I still have yet to watch any reruns or Netflix a single episode of the show. Season nine pulled a really unique move, having the timeline of all 20+ episodes enclosed in the weekend of Barney and Robin's wedding. For seven months the show displayed the strength of Barney and Robin's relationship and for the first time showed little snippets of Ted and the mother together. Goodwill central as far as the audience was concerned.

However that was all unraveled when the wedding ended and was followed by the most slapdash 10 minutes ever put on television: Ted and the mother get married, Barney and Robin got divorced, Barney returns to being a dog, the group disbands, Barney becomes a good, single father, the Mother dies, before the show jumps forward ten more years to Ted ending the story for kids. All of this was rushed and sloppy, but the disquietude of that was turned into rage by what came next. Ted's kids realise the majority of the story was about Robin and their Dad still loves her, so they give their blessing for him to go after her. He does and the show ends with him standing below Robin's apartment holding the blue french horn. If TVs weren't expensive I (and 7/8s of the internet) would have dropkicked it.

Fast forward to today, where I have the summer trying extremely hard to blackout that atrocious closing episode. And then, a glimmer of light; an alternate ending surfaced that was almost broadcasted.

Is that perfect? Good God no, it ends without a final hurdle that good stories desperately need to have a truly appetizing final note. Is it better than the broadcasted finale? Without question. By this point in the HIMYM saga fans were dreadfully tired of the fake out Robin/Ted romance, nine seasons had been building to a relationship that would change Ted's life and put a bow on the story he's telling his children. My issue isn't with killing off the mother or jumping into the future, its in building a story with a secret and then discounting the value of the secret.

Carter Bays and Thomas Craig said after the show aired that the Ted/Robin happy ending was in the plans from the beginning, but if that were true why keep the mother secret? Why keep her in the shadow? Why not have duel storylines where the mother appears occasionally to tell her side of the story (St. Patty's day, the yellow umbrella, going to Victoria's shop, meeting the gang, etc.) The decision to build to her reveal and then toss her in a grave moments later is a sucker punch to the invested audience. The stumbles of that ending are way too many to recount at this point.

So one summer and an alternate ending later my ire has fallen from rage to simple indignation. The fact this clip was released, and on the official season 9 nine DVD set, proves the HIMYM team knew it missed the mark. The problem HIMYM was set up to have a unsatisfying ending. Nine seasons of build up to a major reveal is too much, especially if you don't have a satisfying ending in place before you start production.

So have I forgiven Ted Mosby and crew? Absolutely not. Am I ready to move on with my TV viewing life? Absolutely yes. Just don't expect me to buy in to a mystery sitcom any time soon.